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Vanishing Jane

from The Great Outdoors by The Napoleon of Crime

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about

Moving away from macroeconomic matters, we turn now to the world of internet dating. To an awkward person, it can be a godsend. It is, however, home of its own set of baffling social norms and codes of interaction, which can be just as difficult to parse and abide by as the ones out in the real world. Fail to do so, and you might get "ghosted," as the kids say.

As an aside, upon completing this I was chagrined to discover that Robbie Fulks had also written a song called "Vanishing Jane." Despite owning the record it appears on, I had not heard it when writing mine, and I maintain that I derived the title independently (the woman in question was actually named Jane). I'm a huge fan of Mr. Fulks, but I wouldn't dream of trying to rip him off. I was actually trying to rip off Cheap Trick.

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lyrics

we were pointed towards each other
by science, faith, and math
and it seemed a better way to go
than I'd gone in the past

it might be in my head
or maybe it was something I said
there's a lot space
between the lines to be read

vanishing Jane
all I ever got from you was a number and a name
vanishing Jane
if I never even heard of you, the end would be the same

we could break the summer open
catch the good times pouring out
instead it looks like we're gonna let it
pass without a sound

oh, but who could tell
when you've learned to disappear so well?
I know you won't answer
but come on, what the hell?

vanishing Jane
all I ever got from you was a number and a name
vanishing Jane
if I never even heard of you, the end would be the same

yeah, of course, I'll be alright
that's just the way things go
but if we were never gonna speak
you could've let me know

vanishing Jane
all I ever got from you was a number and a name
vanishing Jane
if I never even heard of you, the end would be the same

vanishing Jane
vanishing Jane

credits

from The Great Outdoors, released September 16, 2016
written by David Gassmann

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The Napoleon of Crime Washington, D.C.

"He is the Napoleon of crime, Watson. He is the organizer of half that is evil and of nearly all that is undetected in this great city. He is a genius, a philosopher, an abstract thinker. He has a brain of the first order . . . My horror at his crimes was lost in my admiration at his skill." -- Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, "The Final Problem" ... more

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